About Me

My name is Cali. I am a Middle School History Teacher and I identify as queer. I am also a proud Mommy of two, wife to my amazing partner in life, Jamie, and lover of drag, tattoos, and nature.

When I started this blog in the Fall of 2013, I wrote completely anonymously, petrified of being outted at school. Sharing my stories, fears, dreams, and insecurities eventually brought me the strength to teach outside of that “safe” little closet. I now come out to my students each year on the first day of school. My life, my family, and my “lifestyle” are a part of me, and therefore have become a part of the way I teach. My identity isn’t a rumor – it’s a fact. And I have learned to be so proud of that identity.

I imagine that many people may not appreciate my shared truths. This isn’t about that. This is about one educator, woman, mom, human showing that she can be so much more than just “That Lesbian Teacher”.

Contact: thatlesbianteacher@yahoo.com.

Instagram: @notesforbirdieb

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11 thoughts on “About Me

  1. can i just say that i FREAKIN’ LOVE the name of your blog?! When I saw your post on the “Common Core” curriculum…I laughed out loud at the awesome name of your blog. After reposting the common core article, it is now late into the evening….but I look forward to coming back and reading up on “that lesbian teacher”. 🙂 –Cassandra

  2. You need to be you but be careful. Education is better served cold. I never told my students where I stood on anything for they can be manipulative and misinterpret what you say. Stay within the curriculum for you have a lot to lose. The world is still a hostile place and a job needs to be kept for financial reasons. We had a young man who had an alternative life style in one of my old schools. Everyone knew it but he kept it low key. He stayed but then he got hit by a disease which took him down.

    • Thank you! I agree with you in so many ways – and yet I don’t know how much longer I can accept it as the norm. It is such a frustrating limbo in which to be stuck. I, too, have never told my students where I stand on major controversies, even when they hit so close to home. I would never want them swayed by my opinions. However, this is different for me. This isn’t just a “hot button issue”…it’s my life. I do really appreciate your advice though! Thanks for checking in!

  3. I’m sorry to assume, but I guess you are American?
    Just with the middle school reference. I love your blog its very funny, very cool.
    Obviously it’s your life.. but my friend is a high school teacher in the UK (ages 11-16) she teaches English. She is a wonderful teacher, truly. She said she would always be out, with her colleagues and with the students. She first came out to the other teachers and when she found who her allies among the staff were, when she thought it was coming to a point where she could come out to the students she told i think maybe 4 other teachers that she was going to just so she had the support there if she needed it. Anyway, one of the kids said to her something about “Oh miss this is really gay and boring” so she got them to talk about what ‘gay’ meant, they talked about people being gay, lesbian, bi, trans and within this conversation she came out to them. Very quickly the whole school found out and to be honest i think it has done the entire school a duty, since she came out TEN of her 14-16 year olds have successfully and with full support of all staff and students come out. I wish there’d been an out lesbian teacher when I was in high school! Don’t you?
    Sorry its so rambley!

    • Yes I live and teach in New Jersey in the US. So great to hear about your friend! That is exactly what I envision when I think of being out to my students. But Middle School is a tough age and parents aren’t always so accepting. I teach in a low-income area but the demographic is mostly Catholic Italians. Even with the general opinion on gay marriage and LGBTQ rights changing now throughout the US, it’s still tough to fight the fear of an angry mob.

      I am making progress, though. Little by little. 🙂

      • Well I truly respect you and love your blog!

        I think you have a tough fight on your hands. I must say the UK even as a whole is fairly ‘cool’ with the gay thing. I’m not saying we don’t have but the sort of religious inspired extremism just isn’t as prominent over here.
        And there is a huge national school campaign for bullying and particularly dealing with homophobia across most of our none private schools. Good luck and I will keep reading ☺

  4. Teach high school, girl…no one will raise an eyebrow. 🙂 My teaching partner is out to our kids, and no one is remotely phased in the least. The times…they are changing for the better, THANK GOD!

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